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Today is July 23 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you allow envy to devour you?” Russian author Alexander Solzhenitsyn said: "Our envy of others devours us most of all." Successful people who navigate the chaos spend little, if any, time allowing envy to devour them or distract them from achieving their dreams. For those navigating the chaos it is easy to fall prey to envy. Person A has some position, status, or wealth that Person B wants. Person B has a variety of options to obtain what Person A has, but the real question Person B needs to ask is ‘do I really want what Person A has or am I envious?’ If envy is involved, then why? It is important to note, however, that envy can sometimes serve as a catalyst for someone trying to navigate the chaos. In an August 10, 2015, New Yorker article Maria Konnikova, summarized the work of researchers Richard Smith and Niels van de Ven regarding envy. Smith, a psychologist at the University of Kentucky suggests envy arises from a combination of two factors: relevance and similarity. Relevance, as defined by Smith, happens when an envied advantage must be meaningful on a personal level. For example, a ballerina’s beautiful dance is unlikely to cause envy in a lawyer, unless the lawyer once had professional dancing aspirations. Similarity, on the other hand, involves some degree of comparison. Konnikova wrote “Even though we’re both writers, I’m unlikely to envy Ernest Hemingway. Aristotle, in describing envy, quotes the saying ‘potter against potter.’ When we admire someone, we do so from a distance. When we envy someone, we picture ourselves in their place.” Today’s question challenges you to reflect and increase your self-awareness when it comes to admiration and envy. Admiration and envy can seem like opposites: admiration inspires us, while envy drags us down. But the psychologist Niels van de Ven, of Tilburg University, in the Netherlands, argues that this duality may not fully capture the emotion’s real complexity. When he examined the concept in cultures across the world, he found that the word envy has dual meetings in other languages and involves a more nuanced interpretation. In English, envy is envy. But in other languages, envy invokes the nuanced range of benign envy, malicious envy, admiration, and resentment. In his examination of envy, author Neel Burton wrote “The pain of envy is not caused by the desire for the advantages of others per se, but by the feeling of inferiority and frustration occasioned by their lack in ourselves. The distraction of envy and the dread of arousing it in others paradoxically holds us back from achieving our fullest potential. Envy also costs us friends and allies, and, more generally, tempers, restrains, and undermines even our closest relationships. In some cases, it can even lead to acts of sabotage, as with the child who breaks the toy that he knows he cannot have. Over time, our anguish and bitterness can lead to physical health problems such as infections, cardiovascular diseases, and cancers; and mental health problems such as depression, anxiety, and insomnia. We are, quite literally, consumed by envy.” One of the characteristics of modern life is the new phenomenon of the intersection of envy and social media. With over 4.5 billion people around the world currently using one or more social media platforms, the levels, complexities, and dynamics involved with envy have taken on a whole new meaning. Alexandra Samuel, author of Work Smarter with Social Media proclaimed “it feels like media has given envy a new lease on life. Envy is so profoundly woven into the experience of using social media that it has brought the term FOMO into common currency: Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) is an almost inevitable byproduct of witnessing other people’s vacations, parties, and purchases through social media.” When you are too busy navigating the chaos you have little, if any, time of FOMO. Samuel goes on to list some of the more common social media catalysts that could potentially spark envy among viewers. “My envy can be inspired by the personal or the professional: by your delightful and picturesque vacation, or your new and fabulous job. It can be provoked by something shallow and materialistic, like the boots you are wearing in your latest selfie, or by something human and meaningful, like your child’s latest academic success. It can be directed towards your success in a field of endeavor we share, like writing, or a field of endeavor I wish I’d thought to pursue, like the law. It can focus on something tangible, like the size of the mansion you just bought, or something intangible, like how you’re able to be content in your tiny bungalow.” For those navigating the chaos and putting in the daily work required to translate dreams into reality, they spend little if any time being devoured by being envious of others. How often do you allow envy to devour you? How often do you consider the difference between admiring someone and being envious of them? How often do you remind yourself that being envious of others can prohibit you from achieving your fullest potential? How often do you see a social media post, become envious, and then experience FOMO?

Today is July 22 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you rely on others for your happiness?" To spark today’s reflection, recall the words of Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard who wrote “A man who as a physical being is always turned toward the outside, thinking that his happiness lies outside him, finally turns inward and discovers that the source is within him.” The research is overwhelmingly clear: “the pressure to be happy makes people less happy. Organizing your life around trying to become happier, making happiness the primary objective of life gets in the way of actually becoming happy.” Research within the field of positive psychology continues to illustrate that having purpose and meaning in life increases overall well-being and life satisfaction, improves mental and physical health, enhances resiliency, enhances self-esteem, and decreases the chances of depression. "Happiness without meaning characterizes a relatively shallow, self-absorbed or even selfish life. What sets human beings apart from animals is not the pursuit of happiness, which occurs across the natural world, but the pursuit of meaning, which is unique to humans.” People who navigate the chaos like actor Taraji P. Henson understand they are responsible for their own happiness. Another extension of this question is ‘why would you ever rely on others for your happiness?’ What is it in you that rejects the notion you provide your own happiness? Translating your dreams into reality is your responsibility and therefore, so too is your happiness. Henson graduated from Oxon Hill High School in Oxon Hill, Maryland, in 1988. She then attended North Carolina Agricultural and Technical State University where she studied electrical engineering before transferring to Howard University to study drama. To pay for college, she worked mornings as a secretary at The Pentagon and evenings as a singing-dancing waitress on a dinner-cruise ship, the Spirit of Washington. With her one-year-old son in hand, she walked across the stage to receive her diploma at Howard University. After college she set out for Hollywood and wondered if she had made a mistake dragging her then 1-year-old far away from her family, her hometown, everything she knew and loved. In an interview Henson said “I remember when I said I was going to move out here [L.A.] and my son was like a year old at the time, and I had no money. Fresh out of college with dreams and stars in my eyes. Some people thought I was crazy. My mom was like ‘You’re going to starve!’ But they are all proud because I had a dream. In my opinion, if you’re not dreaming, you’re not living.” At 26, she found an agent and landed a number of TV roles, including ER and Felicity; then things turned around even more. In 2001, she co-starred in director John Singleton’s Baby Boy, a drama addressing the absentee father epidemic, and in 2005, made a head-turning splash in Terrence Howard’s urban drama Hustle & Flow, which garnered her a Best Actress nomination from the Image Awards. She also sang the film’s Oscar-winning song, “It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp,” performing it at the 2006 Academy Awards – just two weeks after her father lost a battle with cancer. In 2016, Henson starred in the film Hidden Figures, a major box-office success nominated for numerous awards, including three Oscars (Best Picture, Best Adapted Screenplay, and Best Supporting Actress for Octavia Spencer) and two Golden Globes (Best Supporting Actress for Spencer and Best Original Score). It won the Screen Actors Guild Award for Outstanding Performance by a Cast in a Motion Picture. In a speech given at the 2018 Women in Film awards ceremony, Henson said: “I finally get to L.A. graduate, have a kid in college and I have to pursue my dream because if I don't what am I teaching my son? So, I moved to California with seven hundred dollars in my pocket and my toddler. And I had to fight the good fight because people are telling me ‘You can't do this.’ They say ‘Are you crazy? You're moving to California with your son? You'll never make it.’ I was twenty-six when I decided to come here. There's the age thing. Oh, you're too old. If you listen to people and if you allow people to project their fears onto you, you won't live. What if I believed those people who told me that when I became pregnant in college that I wouldn't finish? … Everything in life that is coming to you is going to come through you. It starts inside of you. Whether it is love from another, that love must start within you. If you do not know how to take care of yourself or care for yourself first, how are you going to teach someone else to? You need to fight for your goals with such tenacity. You are the temple, and you have control. If you are in a bad situation it's up to you to get out of it. You can't give another human the responsibility of your happiness.” How often do you rely on others for your happiness? How often do you remind yourself that ‘the source of happiness lies within you?’ How often do you let others drown out your dreams? How often do you realize that ‘everything in life that is coming to you is going to come through you since it starts inside of you?’ How often do you remind yourself that you are in control of how you pursue your goals and leverage your mind, body, and spirit to navigate the chaos? How often do you get out of a bad situation? How often do you give another human the responsibility of your happiness?

Today is July 21 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you reflect upon your relationships?” Those who navigate the chaos understand they have multiple relationships to tend to as they travel down their path of translating their dreams into reality. We have relationships with ourselves, each other, strangers, colleagues, family members, and nature. We do not live in a vacuum and have many relationships over our lifetime. Perhaps the one relationship that goes often overlooked is our ability to connect with nature. It offers, after all, a tremendous benefit for those navigating the chaos. Unfortunately, never have we been so far from merging with the natural world and so divorced from nature. By 2050, 66% of the world’s population is projected to live in cities. According to a study sponsored by the Environmental Protection Agency, the average American spends 93% of his or her time indoors. But the good news is that even a small amount of time in nature can have an impact on your health. A two-hour forest bath will help you to unplug from technology and slow down. It will bring you into the present moment and de-stress and relax you. In Japan, the practice of forest bathing, or shinrin-yoku has existed for centuries. Shinrin in Japanese means “forest,” and yoku means “bath.” So shinrin-yoku means bathing in the forest atmosphere or taking in the forest through your senses. This is not exercise, or hiking, or jogging. It is simply being in nature, connecting with it through your senses of sight, hearing, taste, smell, and touch. Shinrin-yoku is like a bridge. By opening your senses, it bridges the gap between you and the natural world. In other words, being in nature helps you reflect upon your relationship with the larger world around you. Studies have confirmed that spending time within a forest setting can reduce psychological stress, depressive symptoms, and hostility, while at the same time improving sleep and increasing both vigor and a feeling of liveliness," reports Mother Earth News. "These subjective changes match up nicely with objective results reported in nearly a dozen studies involving 24 forests—lower levels of cortisol and lower blood pressure and pulse rate." Just the smell of trees has health benefits. "Chemicals secreted by trees, known as phytoncides, have been linked with improved immune defense as well as a reduction in anxiety and increase in pain threshold," reports Slate in an article on the health benefits of nature. Studies have also shown that children with ADHD who play in a green outdoor environment, rather than an indoor or constructed environment, show a decrease in their symptoms. Even just living around more trees means a healthier overall mental state. A recent study showed that Londoners who live near trees take fewer antidepressants. While the benefits of taking a walk through a forest are clear, what is less understood is the value of silence one encounters during such an experience. British philosopher Alan Watts wrote Hermits in New York to help people understand the value of becoming quiet to see and hear. People who successfully navigate the chaos understand the value of solitude. Watts wrote: “Let us take hermits. People today think being a hermit is a very unhealthy thing to do. Very antisocial, does not contribute anything to everybody else - because everybody else is busy contributing like blazes, and a few people have to run off and get out of the way. But I'll tell you what hermits realize. If you go off into a far, far forest and get incredibly quiet, you'll come to understand that you're connected with everything. That every little insect that comes buzzing around you is a messenger, and that little insect is connected with human beings everywhere else. You can hear. You become incredibly sensitive in your ears, and you hear far-off sounds. And just by the very nature of isolating yourself and becoming quiet, you become intensely aware of your relationship with everything else that's going on.” Now for some, who have an ego-centric view of the world where they are the center of the universe, today’s question will probably go unnoticed. For others, however, those who successfully navigate the chaos, they understand they are part of a larger world. The universe revolves around the sun, not their ego. To navigate the chaos it is important to reflect upon your relationships with yourself, those closest to you, strangers, those who are unable to help you, and nature. How you relate matters. Somewhere along your path you will need the support, help, and encouragement of those around you. Nature will play a role in how you succeed. Albert Einstein wrote: “A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.” How often do you reflect upon your relationships? How often do you ‘widen your circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty? How often do you spend time outdoors with no real purpose other than being one with the surrounding nature?

Today is July 20 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often can you just DO?” Few people DO, however, and as a result, DO NOT navigate the chaos. In 1960, pioneering American artists Sol LeWitt and Eva Hesse met for the first time and became close friends. Hesse began suffering from creative block and self-doubt shortly after moving from New York to Germany with her husband. She reached out to her LeWitt for counsel and consolation, and he replied with a spectacular letter dated April 14, 1965. The following is an excerpt (Warning contains R rated language): “Dear Eva, it will be almost a month since you wrote to me and you have possibly forgotten your state of mind (I doubt it though). You seem the same as always, and being you, hate every minute of it. Don’t! Learn to say ‘Fuck You’ to the world once in a while. You have every right to. Just stop thinking, worrying, looking over your shoulder, wondering, doubting, fearing, hurting, hoping for some easy way out, struggling, grasping, confusing, itching, scratching, mumbling, bumbling, grumbling, humbling, stumbling, numbling, rambling, gambling, tumbling, scumbling, scrambling, hitching, hatching, bitching, moaning, groaning, honing, boning, horse-shitting, hair-splitting, nit-picking, piss-trickling, nose sticking, ass-gouging, eyeball-poking, finger-pointing, alleyway-sneaking, long waiting, small stepping, evil-eyeing, back-scratching, searching, perching, besmirching, grinding, grinding, grinding away at yourself. Stop it and just DO!... you are not responsible for the world — you are only responsible for your work — so DO IT. And don’t think that your work has to conform to any preconceived form, idea, or flavor. It can be anything you want it to be.” In 2016, actor Benedict Cumberbatch gave a dramatic reading of LeWitt’s impassioned five-page missive, which remains the closest thing to a personal creative credo LeWitt ever committed to words. Hesse was a German-born American sculptor known for her pioneering work in materials such as latex, fiberglass, and plastics. She is one of the artists who ushered in the post-minimal art movement in the 1960s. In 1962, Hesse met and married sculptor Tom Doyle (1928–2016); they divorced in 1966. Hesse graduated from New York's School of Industrial Art at the age of 16, and in 1952 she enrolled in the Pratt Institute of Design. She dropped out only a year later. When Hesse was 18, she interned at Seventeen magazine. During this time, she also took classes at the Art Students League and eventually received her BA from Yale University in 1959. While at Yale, Hesse studied under Josef Albers and was heavily influenced by Abstract Expressionism. After Yale, Hesse returned to New York, where she became friends with many other young minimalist artists, including Sol LeWitt, Donald Judd, Yayoi Kusama, and others. Her close friendship with Sol LeWitt continued until the end of her life. Both Hesse and LeWitt went on to become influential artists; their friendship stimulated the artistic development of their work. The two frequently wrote to one another, and in 1965 LeWitt wrote the aforementioned letter where he famously counseled a young doubting Eva to "Stop [thinking] and just DO!” In October 1969, she was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and she died on May 29, 1970, after three failed operations within a year. Her death at the age of 34 ended a career that would become highly influential, despite spanning only a decade. Her art is often viewed in the context of the many struggles of her life. This includes escaping from the Nazis, her parents' divorce, the suicide of her mother when she was 10, her failed marriage, and the death of her father. Despite all these struggles during her brief 34 years, Hesse found a way to navigate the chaos and become one of the most influential artists of the 20th century. A 2016 documentary entitled Eva Hesse, premiered in New York, illustrated her painful background. Directed by Marcie Begleiter, the film tells the story of Hesse's tragically foreshortened life and "focuses on those years of artistic emergence, a period of rapid development and furious productivity, with few parallels in the history of art." How often can you just DO? How often can you just DO? How often are you thinking about DOING instead of actually DOING? How often are you worry about what others may think about you and your work? How often are you paranoid and looking over your shoulder? How often are you hoping for some easy way out of navigating the chaos? How often are you fearing that your work will not be ‘good enough’ (whatever that means)? How often are you struggling to DO and instead find yourself NOT DOING? How often are you stumbling along the path of navigating the chaos and, as a result, not DOING what it is you want to DO? How often are you bitching about how unfair life is and, as a result, you wind up NOT DOING what it is you want to DO? How often do you remind yourself ‘you are not responsible for the world – you are only responsible for your work?’ Is there anyone in your life who can help remind you to just DO? Have you ever reminded someone to just DO?

Today is July 19 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you resign yourself to the shutting away of life?” Those who navigate the chaos choose otherwise and realize the shutting away of life is a sign of giving up. Translating dreams into reality requires daily momentum and to give in to the shutting away of life would prohibit even the smallest of steps forward. Poets often write about such matters and have provided us with many examples over the years. Poets dwell on the specific. They concentrate their pen on the slightest of human endeavors. Looking inward, poets often speak from the heart and create stories to convey important messages. Two such poets that mused on the end of life were Edna St. Vincent Millay and Alfred Lord Tennyson. American poet and playwright Edna St. Vincent Millay received the Pulitzer Prize for Poetry in 1923, the third woman to win the award for poetry, and was also known for her feminist activism. In 1904, her mother Cora officially divorced Millay's father and, with Millay’s two sisters, moved often living in poverty. Cora traveled with a trunk full of classic literature, including Shakespeare and Milton, which she read to her children. The family settled in a small house on the property of Cora's aunt in Camden, Maine, where Millay would write the first of the poems that would bring her literary fame. The three sisters were independent and spoke their minds, which did not always sit well with the authority figures in their lives. After graduating Vassar College Millay moved to New York City and continued to write poetry. One of Millay’s well-known poems is Dirge Without Music where she writes “I am not resigned to the shutting away of loving hearts in the hard ground. So it is, and so it will be, for so it has been, time out of mind; into the darkness they go, the wise and the lovely. Crowned with lilies and with laurel they go; but I am not resigned. Down, down, down into the darkness of the grave. Gently they go, the beautiful, the tender, the kind; quietly they go, the intelligent, the witty, the brave. I know. But I do not approve. And I am not resigned.” For those unfamiliar with St. Vincent Millay’s poem they would have been introduced to it in the 2017 American comedy-drama film The Hero directed and edited by Brett Haley and written by Haley and Marc Basch. It stars Sam Elliott, Laura Prepon, Krysten Ritter, Nick Offerman and Katharine Ross and follows an aging movie star who deals with his terminal illness. In his poem Ulysses, written in 1833 and published in 1842 in his well-received second volume of poetry, British poet Alfred Lord Tennyson echoed similar thoughts and wrote “Though much is taken, much abides; and though; We are not now that strength which in old days; Moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are, One equal temper of heroic hearts, Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will; To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.” For those unfamiliar with Tennyson they would have been introduced to it in the 2012 James Bond film Skyfall. In the movie actor Dame Judi Dench, who portrays ‘M’ the Head of the Secret Intelligence Service MI 6, recites the poet’s words towards the end of the film. What is most interesting here is the intersection of old poetry and modern film. Examples of navigating the chaos are all around us. The preponderance of support, examples, and stories served as a catalyst for me to catalog as many as possible into a daily question post. Here we have two poems from the past included in the scripts of two modern films. What a beautiful intersection of modernity and antiquity. Audiences for both films were challenged to ask if they were shutting away life or yielding to time and fate. Brazilian gymnast and World Champion in the floor exercise, Diego Hypolito knows something about navigating the chaos and not yielding to time and fate. He competed in the Beijing 2008 Olympics and fell on his back. Four years later in London 2012 he fell on his face. He was devasted to have fallen for a second time at the Olympic games but continued navigating the chaos. At the 2016 Olympic games in Rio, he completed a near perfect routine and finished with a silver medal. In an interview after the medal ceremony, he said: “In Beijing I landed on my backside, in London I landed on my face...this time I landed on my feet, with my head held high." How often have you resigned to the shutting away of life? Do you strive, to seek and find and not to yield? If you have been made weak by time and fate, do you remain strong in will?

Today is July 18 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you learn lessons from history?” Navigating the chaos requires one to recognize forward progress is dependent upon a bias towards action, an indefatigable spirit, and a willingness to travel outside of their comfort zone. These three characteristics allow individuals the ability to view their past actions and extract valuable lessons. Since reflection is involved, however, it is important to note two distinct yet related dynamics. First, do not get stuck in the past during your reflection as doing so will cause you to miss the present. Second, the lessons you learn from reflection are yours and yours alone. It is up to you to reflect and engage with the past in order to actively learn from it. But then it is time to move on. Failing to recognize these two dynamics jeopardizes your ability to navigate the chaos and practice the art of living well. Author Aldous Huxley noted “That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons that history has to teach.” Huxley’s point is well take in that it reminds us of three imperatives: a)history has tremendous potential in what it can teach, b)people fail to learn from history, and c)the greatest lesson of history is that people fail to learn from history. A similar quote is attributed to writer and philosopher George Santayana "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it." An extension of these observations on the failure of remembering history is the oft quoted definition of insanity as “doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.” What is interesting about the insanity quote is that it is misattributed to Albert Einstein. There appears to be no evidence to suggest Einstein ever articulated a definition of insanity. According to the web site Quote Investigator, there were three variations on this theme published in 1981. The first iteration came from Jessie Potter, the featured speaker at the 1981 Woman to Woman conference focused on education and family relationships, who said “If you always do what you’ve always done, you always get what you’ve always gotten.” The second iteration came from an anonymous attended of an Al-Anon meeting who said during the group session “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” And the third iteration came from a November 1981 pamphlet from Narcotics Anonymous “Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results.” Best-selling author Veronica Chambers learned from her history and in so doing reclaimed her self-esteem and unlocked a world of possibility. In a January 20, 2020, New York Times article, Chambers details how she quit working at a magazine and for a woman who would never respect her. “Once upon a time, I worked at a magazine, reporting to a white woman who, early in our working relationship, told me that she didn’t consider me a threat because ‘a black woman will never have this job.’ She then proceeded to use every one of my ideas to completely redesign the magazine we worked for. It was the end of a moment in publishing when such a thing as a “big magazine job” still existed. I hung on because I really wanted to be an editor in chief one day and knew that quitting would take me out of the game.” But after spending one amazing day at the beach with her family, Chambers knew it was time to quit. As she wrote in her piece: “What came next was that I wrote four New York Times best sellers. I won two James Beard awards. I had a novel optioned by a producer I had long admired. I taught at Stanford University and Smith College. I was able to carve out an extraordinary amount of time to spend with my poor daughter who had started kindergarten sleep deprived and with a slight bellyache from me shoving fries down her throat in a moving car and calling it dinner. I did not want to just quit my job, I wanted to make a better life for myself. That came with a lot of hard work, and even overworking myself, but I did it for myself and on my own terms.” Chambers came to realize that she was failing to learn from the lessons of history, doing the same thing and getting what she always did, and doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. She could have stayed at the magazine and tried to wait until she was anointed editor-in-chief. But like so many people that navigate the chaos, she came to realize that her editor-in-chief goal eventually took a back seat to a new and more prominent one of making a better life for herself. Today’s question challenges you to examine your current life situation and honestly assess if you are doing the same thing today that you did last month or last year and expecting different results. Those who navigate the chaos can answer that question honestly and without hesitation. For others, however, doing so is too painful so they convince themselves things are indeed different and better when the opposite is true. How you answer determines your ability to translate your dreams into reality so be careful and look at your current life situation and ask if you are learning lessons from history. How often do you learn from the lessons of history? How often do you find yourself doing the same thing over and over expecting different results? Who or what is preventing you from learning from the lessons of history? Have you ever helped anyone learn lessons from their past? Who has helped you learn lessons from your past?

Today is July 17 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you remind yourself hope begins in the dark?” While you are leveraging your mind, body, and spirit to navigate the chaos of life and translate one dream after another into reality, it is inevitable your path will turn dark. When the path gets so dark it is important to ask yourself today’s question and reflect upon how often you remind yourself that hope begins in the dark. The death of a parent. The compound loss of two people you love in a brief period of time. Being laid off from a job through no fault of your own. The loss of a friendship. The inability to help someone who then commits suicide. The helplessness associated with watching a loved one die of an incurable disease. The frustration over a car accident. The inability to make sense out of the sudden death of a friend. The darkness we feel when a serious illness impacts our own health. Darkness comes in many forms. And darkness happens to everyone at some point. There is no escaping it. Sometimes we can see the darkness out in the distance. The clouds on the horizon serve as a warning sign to seek shelter. Other times the darkness creeps up on us when we least expect it. The darkness blinds us, paralyzes us, and holds us prisoner. The darkness, if you let it, will consume you. Those who have navigated the chaos understand the darkness. They do not welcome it, they do not invite it in, but they also do not dwell there. They accept the darkness as a temporary condition and understand that hope begins there. Emily Elizabeth Dickinson’s poem “We grow accustomed to the Dark” was written in the early 1860s and serves as an excellent point of reflection for today’s question. The entirety of the poem is: We grow accustomed to the Dark - When light is put away - As when the Neighbor holds the Lamp To witness her Goodbye - A Moment - We uncertain step For newness of the night - Then - fit our Vision to the Dark - And meet the Road - erect - And so of larger - Darknesses - Those Evenings of the Brain - When not a Moon disclose a sign - Or Star - come out - within - The Bravest - grope a little - And sometimes hit a Tree Directly in the Forehead - But as they learn to see - Either the Darkness alters - Or something in the sight Adjusts itself to Midnight - And Life steps almost straight. The poem comprises of five short stanzas, throughout which the Dickinson walks through the dark and assures the reader that their eyes will eventually adjust to the darkness. Initially, it feels like stumbling outside into the night after being indoors; it can surely be scary and can take a while to be able to move around confidently without falling. But eventually, our eyes get used to the darkness and then walking around is no more an issue. Dickinson, however, goes on to say, some darker nights, especially those of the mind, require a little more than time. She explains herself by saying that the bravest goes forth in the darkness, sometimes walking into an obstacle like a tree. But despite the obstacles and circumstances, those who venture out into the darkest of nights, will eventually be able to make it to the road to find their way. Although she was from a prominent family with strong ties to its community, Dickinson lived much of her life in reclusive isolation. Her poems were unique for her era, and much ahead of her time; they contained short lines, typically lacked titles, and often use slant rhyme as well as unconventional capitalization and punctuation. Many of her poems deal with themes of death and immortality. After her death in 1886, her younger sister Lavinia discovered her cache of poems; it was then that the breadth of work became apparent to the public. How often do you believe hope begins in the dark? How often do you grow accustomed to the dark? What have you done lately to give yourself hope in the dark? Have you ever been stuck in the dark for an extended period of time? If so, how did you escape it? How often have you ‘sometimes hit a tree but adjust yourself to midnight?’ Have you provided hope to someone who may have grown accustomed to the dark?

Today is July 16 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you remind yourself it is never too late to start?” Those who translate their dreams into reality understand two basic principles: you need as many dreams as it would take you two lifetimes to achieve and it is never too late to dream. At 23, Tina Fey was working at a YMCA. At 24, Stephen King was working as a janitor and living in a trailer. At 27, Vincent Van Gogh failed as a missionary and decided to go to art school. At 28, J.K. Rowling was a struggling single parent living on welfare. At 30, Harrison Ford was a carpenter. At 37, Ang Lee was a stay-at-home-dad working odd jobs. At 39, Julia Child released her first cookbook and got her cooking show at age 51. At 40, Vera Wang designed her first dress. At 40, Stan Lee released his first big comic book. At 42, Alan Rickman gave up his graphic design career to pursue acting. At 42, Samuel L. Jackson got his first movie role. At 51 Leonardo Da Vinci painted the Mona Lisa. At 52, Morgan Freeman landed his first major movie role. At 53 Ray Kroc bought the McDonalds franchise and took it to unprecedented levels. At 54 Dr. Seuss wrote "The Cat in the Hat". At 57, Kathryn Bigelow achieved global success when she made The Hurt Locker. At 59, Kawasaki Shozo founded Kawasaki. At 61, Charles Flint founded IBM. At 62, Col. Harland Sanders founded KFC. At 76, Grandma Moses began her painting career. Many of those on the list had multiple careers. Some started over in an entirely different field. Some quit and changed directions. They all had one thing in common – they kept going and believed it was never too late to start. American ballet dancer Misty Danielle Copeland said “You can start late. Look different. Be uncertain. And still succeed. The opportunities are out there. You just have to believe in yourself and not let anyone's words come in and define you and change your path. You are going to hear 'no' in life no matter what you do. You just have to keep pushing and persevering. And I think it's important to know that it doesn't matter what your skin color is, or your body shape is. Whatever you want to do, you should go for it.” She did. Copeland tells her story in Life in Motion: An Unlikely Ballerina. She started learning ballet at 13 years of age, much later than when most dancers start, taking her first class on a basketball court at a Boys and Girls Club. Since most dancers take up to 15 years to get the right amount of training to make it to a professional level by 17 years of age, she had to shove all of that into four years. By age 15, her mother and ballet teachers, who were serving as her custodial guardians, fought a very public custody battle over her. The 1998 legal issues involved filings for emancipation by Copeland and restraining orders by her mother. Both sides dropped legal proceedings, and Copeland moved home to begin studying under a new teacher who was a former American Ballet Theater (ABT) member. In 1997, Copeland won the Los Angeles Music Center Spotlight Award as the best dancer in Southern California. After two summer workshops with ABT, she became a member of ABT's Studio Company in 2000 and its corps de ballet in 2001 and became an ABT soloist in 2007. As a soloist from 2007 to mid-2015, she was described as having matured into a more contemporary and sophisticated dancer. On June 30, 2015, Copeland became the first African American woman to be promoted to principal dancer in ABT's 75-year history. With a non-traditional entry into ballet, Copeland has created buzz outside of that world due to her being one of the few African American performers seen in classical dance. In a meteoric rise, she has continually acknowledged the responsibility she feels to others looking to make their way in dance. Her trailblazing accomplishments have been recognized by a range of institutions, and in spring 2015 she was named one of Time Magazine’s 100 Most Influential People. How often do you feel as though you are starting too late, think you look too different, or remain uncertain? Whatever your dreams are is, it is not too late to achieve them. Never tell yourself you are too old to make it. Never tell yourself you missed your chance. Never tell yourself that you are not good enough. As C.S. Lewis noted "You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream." How often do you remind yourself that you are never too old to follow your dreams? Is someone in your life telling you it is too late to pursue one of your dreams? Have you stopped pursuing a goal because you told yourself you were too old? Has someone told you that you were too told to try something? Do you have enough dreams for two lifetimes to achieve? Have you ever told someone it is too late for them to start something? If you have trouble setting a new goal or dreaming a new dream, why do you think that is?

Today is July 15 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often are you learning, unlearning, and relearning?” Those who leverage their mind, body, and spirit to navigate the chaos and translate one dream after another into reality often use the strategy of learning something, then unlearning it in order to relearn a new way of thinking about it or doing it. American writer, futurist, and businessman Alvin Toffler wrote a series of seminal works on the future where he repeatedly expressed the need for individuals to learn, unlearn, and relearn. In 1970 Toffler published his first book about the future with Future Shock. He coined the term "future shock" to refer to what happens to a society when change happens too fast, which results in social confusion and normal decision-making processes breaking down. He and his wife Heidi Toffler, who collaborated with him for most of his writings, then moved on to examining the reaction to changes in society with another best-selling book, The Third Wave in 1980. In it, they foresaw such technological advances as cloning, personal computers, the Internet, cable television and mobile communication. The Toffler’s later focus, via their other best-seller, Powershift, (1990), was on the increasing power of 21st-century military hardware and the proliferation of new technologies. In Powershift Toffler wrote “The illiterate of the 21st Century are not those who cannot read and write but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.” Toffler learned firsthand how to navigate the chaos by understanding the necessity to learn, unlearn, and relearn. Born in New York City, and raised in Brooklyn, Toffler was inspired to become a writer at the age of 7 by his aunt and uncle. "They were Depression-era literary intellectuals and they always talked about exciting ideas." After meeting Heidi in college, the two married and moved out to the Midwest where they spent five years as blue-collar workers on assembly lines while studying industrial mass production in their daily work. He compared his own desire for experience to other writers, such as Jack London, who in his quest for subjects to write about sailed the seas, and John Steinbeck, who went to pick grapes with migrant workers. In their first factory jobs, Heidi became a union shop steward in the aluminum foundry where she worked. Alvin became a millwright and welder. His hands-on practical labor experience helped Alvin Toffler land a position at a union-backed newspaper, a transfer to its Washington bureau in 1957, then three years as a White House correspondent, covering Congress and the White House for a Pennsylvania daily newspaper. They returned to New York City in 1959 when Fortune magazine invited Alvin to become its labor columnist, later having him write about business and management. After leaving Fortune magazine in 1962, Toffler began a freelance career, writing long form articles for scholarly journals and magazines. Toffler spent the 1960s conducting research with Heidi for what would eventually become their first book Future Shock. As Alvin Toffler wrote in Future Shock: “To survive, to avert what we have termed future shock, the individual must become infinitely more adaptable and capable than ever before. We must search out totally new ways to anchor ourselves, for all the old roots - religion, nation, community, family, or profession - are now shaking under the hurricane impact of the accelerative thrust. It is no longer resources that limit decisions, it is the decision that makes the resources.” But this ‘searching out totally new ways’ to do just about anything is often met with resistance from those who are unable, unwilling, or unrealistic about the rate and frequency of change. As Toffler wrote in The Third Wave: "A new civilization is emerging in our lives, and blind men everywhere are trying to suppress it. This new civilization brings with it new family styles; changed ways of working, loving, and living; a new economy; new political conflicts; and beyond all this an altered consciousness as well...The dawn of this new civilization is the single most explosive fact of our lifetimes." Toffler was unapologetic regarding the role individuals had when it came to adapting to change and wrote “Our moral responsibility is not to stop the future, but to shape it...to channel our destiny in humane directions and to ease the trauma of transition.” To survive and thrive in a world of constant change, those who navigate the chaos often put into practice the observation of psychologist Herbert Gerjuoy of the Human Resources Research Organization who noted “The new education must teach the individual how to classify and reclassify information, how to evaluate its veracity, how to change categories when necessary, how to move from the concrete to the abstract and back, how to look at problems from a new direction—how to teach himself. Tomorrow’s illiterate will not be the man who can’t read; he will be the man who has not learned how to learn.” How often are you learning, unlearning, and relearning? How often do you talk about ideas? How often do you remind yourself that ‘your moral responsibility is not to stop the future but to shape it?’ How often do you move from the concrete to the abstract and back? How often do you look at problems from a new direction? Are you blind and trying to suppress change? If so, why is that? How often do you remind others that they too need to learn how to learn in order to navigate the chaos?

Today is July 14 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you respond with intention?” For those translating their dreams into reality, they understand the observations by British politician and writer Benjamin Disraeli who noted “Circumstances are beyond human control, but our conduct is in our own power.” Those who navigate the chaos often recognize the randomness of life often creates circumstances beyond their control; yet they work hard at being intentional with their response. This is especially true when it comes to the relationship between one’s career and one’s life purpose. For example, when someone loses their job they might consider themselves a loser, they might be bitter towards their employer, or they may shut themselves off from the rest of the world. For those who leverage their mind, body, and spirit to navigate the chaos, they remind themselves of the following observation by best-selling author Beverly D. Flaxington “The problem with defining yourself by what happens to you is that life is more random than we’d like to think. Yes, sometimes the person who studies hard or networks well or works all hours succeeds in a way that someone who isn’t putting in the effort does not. However, as much as you may not like to admit it, there are also people who don’t put in a lot of effort and are naturally talented in a certain way, connected to the right people, or simply in the right place at the right time. Controlling what happens to you is not as easy as it may sound. But you can control how you respond.” Those who navigate the chaos build a level of personal confidence over time that allows them to move through life in an unshakeable manner, regardless of the outward circumstances. Responding with intention takes years of experience, reflection, and direction. Part of that process involves recalling the words of former first lady Eleanor Roosevelt who said, “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” During each day moving forward understand that being a ‘good’ person does not necessarily mean only good things will happen to you. One of the common threads throughout this entire Navigate the Chaos series is the realization that many people who have translated one dream after another had to deal with any number of issues, unforeseen events, and even tragedies along the way. How they responded with intention made all the difference in the accomplishment of their dreams. Rabbi Harold Kushner experienced first-hand the concept that ‘being a good person does not necessarily mean only good things will happen to you.’ In his 1981 international best-selling work of non-fiction When Bad Things Happen to Good People Kushner poses the question “if the universe was created and is governed by a God who is of a good and loving nature, why is there so much suffering and pain in it?” The book is dedicated to the memory of Kushner's young son, Aaron, who died at the age of 14 in 1977 of the incurable genetic disease Progeria. Kushner provides the following observation to guide the reader through part of the process involved with responding with intention when bad things happen. “‘What did I do to deserve this?’ is an understandable outcry from a sick and suffering person, but it is really the wrong question. Being sick or being healthy is not a matter of what God decides that we deserve. The better question is ‘If this has happened to me, what do I do now, and who is there to help me do it?’” As Flaxington noted “You have to learn to start separating who you are and how you think about yourself from what happens to you, good or bad. People who are super smart and talented, and even well networked and liked, get laid off. Someone who is devoted to health and wellness and takes good care of their physical body gets sick. Being a ‘good’ person doesn’t mean that only good things will happen to you.” In his follow-up book published in 1986 entitled When All You’ve Ever Wanted Isn’t Enough: The Search for a Life That Matters, Kushner reflected upon his first book released five years earlier and discussed his need to respond with intention. “The book’s success brought me some measure of fame and fortune, kept me impossibly busy for several years, put a strain on my health, my family, and my non-book related activities. But what it did more than anything else was force me to sort out the desirable from the less desirable in all of that glitter. Time and again I had to ask myself, ‘Is this what I really want out of life?’ I had to decide how I wanted to spend the limited time and energy I had, and what I really wanted to be remembered for.” His own search for meaning, his reflections, and his desire to be intentional in his response to life situations all formed the foundation of When All You’ve Ever Wanted Isn’t Enough. How often do you respond with intention? How often do you remind yourself that some, perhaps most, circumstances are beyond your control? How often do you remind yourself ‘your conduct is in your own power?’ How often do you remind yourself that you ‘can control how you respond?’ How often do you feel inferior to someone? Is that the intentionally response you really wanted to have? How often do you ‘separate yourself from who you are and how you think about yourself from what happens to you? Do you accept the premise that ‘being a good person does not necessarily mean that only good things will happen to you?’ How often do you spend enough time thinking about how you want to respond to any given life situation?

Today is July 13 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you feel sorry for yourself?” American statesman Benjamin Franklin noted “He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.” Those who navigate the chaos seldom feel sorry for themselves. They simply have no time. Desiree Linden, Juan José Méndez Fernández, Frida Kahlo and Nairo Alexander Quintana Rojas are examples of extraordinary people who did not feel sorry for themselves. After battling sheets of rain, temperatures in the 30s and wind gusts up to 25 mph, Desiree Linden won the 2018 Boston Marathon; the first American woman to win there since 1985. “I think everyone was feeling bad based on the conditions,” she said in a New York Times interview. “But I was like, ‘Are you going to feel sorry for yourself, or are you going to compete and get this done?" Her victory at Boston also illustrated her grit as it took her 12 years of competing in marathons to finally win one. It was Linden’s sixth time competing here, and her knowledge of the course and trademark no-nonsense grit finally paid off. In 2011, she came in second in a sprint down Boylston Street, runner-up that year by only two seconds. Although she won by more than four minutes, she never looked back and said she ran scared the whole way to the finish line. As Linden recalled: “At six miles I thought, ‘No way, not my day,’ and then it was kind of hilarious how it worked out. You don’t want to go out into the lead—I was like, ‘this is going to go horribly wrong; I’m going to blow up.’ When you’re thinking you’re going to drop out, you don’t do the right things along the way. Then you break the tape, and you're like, ‘This is not what I expected today,’ but it’s absolutely amazing. Running down Boylston is amazing.” At 27 Juan José Méndez Fernández lost his left arm and most of his left leg in a motorcycle accident. “I passed out on the bike and crashed into a car. I got covered with a blanket until a policeman realized I was moving.” Fernandez started cycling to lose weight and after gaining substantial weight woke up one day said, “I can’t go on like this, I have to look forward, I want to live.” He would go on to win Paralympic medals in Athens and Beijing, gold in a world championship. Mexican painter Frida Kahlo observed: “At the end of the day, we can endure much more than we think we can.” Although she was disabled by polio as a child, Kahlo had been a promising student headed for medical school until a traffic accident at age eighteen, which caused her lifelong pain and medical problems. During her recovery, she returned to her childhood hobby of art with the idea of becoming an artist. Kahlo's work as an artist remained relatively unknown until the late 1970s, when her work was rediscovered by art historians and political activists. By the early 1990s, she had become not only a recognized figure in art history, but also regarded as an icon for Chicanos, the feminism movement, and the LGBT movement. Kahlo's work has been celebrated internationally as emblematic of Mexican national and indigenous traditions and by feminists for what is seen as its uncompromising depiction of the female experience and form. Nairo Alexander Quintana Rojas is a professional Colombian racing cyclist who had many reasons to make excuses but choose not to do so. As a result, he worked his way to the top of the cycling world. His best career results are winning the 2014 Giro d'Italia and 2016 Vuelta a España, as well as a 2nd place overall in the Tour de France of 2013 and 2015. When he was young his family did not have much. According to Quintana “we didn’t have a lot of money. My parents worked extremely hard for many hours to support us, and the bicycle became an important utensil to help them in our shop and farm.” When he was 16 years old, he used to drive his father’s car working as a taxi driver to raise money for the family so his father could rest. Quintana also had to recover from being involved in an accident when he was out riding. “A taxi hit me when I was 15. I was in a coma in the hospital for five days. I was incredibly lucky to survive. Thinking about the past helps me to realize how hard everybody worked in my home so I can be where I am now.” As with most emotions, there are upsides to feeling sorry for yourself though. Such upsides are only available to those who are aware they exist as strategies to navigate the chaos themselves. As Jennifer Lock Oman wrote in a January 18, 2022, Psychology Today article “Grief, especially feeling sorrow for ourselves, travels with three particular emotions— anger, distress, and shame. While, without question, this trifecta of feelings can feel unbearable, it also carries gifts. Once released from a frozen state, anger can turn into healthy agency; sadness can turn into asking for what we need; and shame can turn into remembering our inherent goodness and knowing where responsibility really lies for what happened to us.” How often do you feel sorry for yourself? If you do feel sorry for yourself, how long does such a feeling last? Why do you feel sorry for yourself? How often have you turned the anger from feeling sorry for yourself into health agency? How often have you turned sadness from feeling sorry for yourself into asking what you really need at that life moment? How often have you turned the shame from feeling sorry for yourself into remembering your inherent goodness?

Today is July 12 and the Navigate the Chaos question to consider is “how often do you believe you are 100% in charge of your life?” Indian Hindu monk, yogi, and guru Paramahansa Yogananda noted “Success is hastened or delayed by one’s habits. It is not your passing inspirations or brilliant ideas so much as your everyday mental habits that control your life.” Paramahansa introduced millions to the teachings of meditation and Kriya Yoga through his organization Self-Realization Fellowship and his best-selling 1946 book Autobiography of a Yogi. Fellow best-selling author Jack Canfield would echo Paramahansa’s thoughts and wrote “You only have control over three things in your life – the thoughts you think, the images you visualize, and the actions you take.” Comedian Jerry Seinfeld navigated the chaos when he was fired from a television show by taking charge of his life. Seinfeld had a small role on the sitcom "Benson," but the producers did not like the way he was playing the part. They fired him after only three episodes yet never told him. He showed up for a read-through one day and found his part was missing. He was humiliated, but he went right back to performing at comedy clubs. After one performance, a talent scout for the "Tonight Show" was in the audience. Seinfeld landed a gig on the show and his career immediately took off. He could have easily felt sorry for himself and stopped performing for a while. He could have blamed the producers of Benson for firing him. But like almost everyone who navigates the chaos, Seinfeld believed he was in charge of his life and went out performing. Like Seinfeld, professional runner Dave Wottle believed he was also in charge of his life. In 1972, then 22-year-old Dave Wottle took charge of his life, got married, and won a gold medal in the 800-meter final of the Olympics. The vision of Wottle, a lanky, shaggy-haired 22-year-old in a golf cap, making up a 10-meter deficit on the final lap to first catch the pack of runners, then move up to third, and then in the final steps catch Soviet star Evgeni Arzhenov to win by just 0.03 seconds, is one of the indelible Olympic images of the last 50 years. But inextricably tied to his Olympic story is another gala event -- his wedding to his wife, Jan. “I was married six days after the Olympic trials, July 15, 1972," Wottle said. "Part of our honeymoon was at the pre-Olympic training camp at Bowdoin College in Maine." That honeymoon was not universally well-received. Bill Bowerman, the legendary Oregon coach who helmed the Olympic track team in 1972, was not pleased with Wottles’ nuptials. "He was old-school, and I'm trying to think how to put this tactfully," Wottle said, "but he thought women weakened legs." So much so, that after Wottle qualified for the Games in both his specialty, the 1,500 meters, and in the 800, Bowerman tried to talk the freshly minted Bowling Green graduate out of his wedding. Wottle politely refused. The Wottles wed, spent a few days together at a state park in Ohio, and headed off to training camp in Maine. Although Wottle was in peak condition at the trials he went out hard the first day of training -- "trying to show people I was ready even after I got married," he said -- and hurt his left knee. The tendinitis kept him from running for more than a week and curtailed much of his training in the run-up to the Games. Jan kept reassuring her husband that things would work out. She was right. Following Wottle’s gold medal run, announcer Jim McKay said, “some people said he should not have got married since it was going to ruin him.” But it did not ruin him. Wottle personified what entrepreneur and author Gary Vaynerchuk would eventually proclaim: "You are 100 fucking percent in charge of your life - stop fucking bitching." But people do bitch about their life, their failures, and their situation. All the time. Why is this? One explanation as to why people wallow in self-pity bitching all the time can be found in the words of French philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre who wrote the following passage in his 1946 publication Existentialism is a Humanism: “For many have but one resource to sustain them in their misery, and that is to think, ‘Circumstances have been against me, I was worthy to be something much better than I have been. I admit I have never had a great love or a great friendship; but that is because I never met a man or a woman who were worthy of it; if I have not written any very good books, it is because I had not the leisure to do so; or, if I have had no children to whom I could devote myself it is because I did not find the man I could have lived with. So there remains within me a wide range of abilities, inclinations, and potentialities, unused but perfectly viable, which endow me with a worthiness that could never be inferred from the mere history of my actions.’” How often do you believe you are 100% in charge of your life? How often do you remind yourself your ‘success is hastened or delayed by your habits?’ How often do you remind yourself ‘you only have control over three things in life – the thoughts you think, the images you visualize, and the actions you take.?’ How often do you find yourself bitching about your life situation yet doing nothing to change it? How often have you convinced yourself that ‘circumstances have been against me?’